Sexual Motivation and the Importance of Orgasm

Motivation to engage in sexual activity varies according to gender and personality. Some individuals are more personally confident and assertive than others. Women are naturally more inclined tokeep the peace rather than assert their own opinions.
People with high personal confidence do not necessarily identify with obtaining confirmation of their personal worth from those around them. Men approach sex more interested in what they hope to gain than in how they might entice a partner.
Women who masturbate regularly throughout their lives also approach orgasm with a very specific knowledge of how to achieve it - just about every time. They are motivated to enjoy orgasm without any requirement to keep a man happy.Sadly women's specialised use of fantasy works alone but not in the social context of sex.
Within a relationship there is the reassurance of being found attractive by a partner. There is also a degree of performance required - real or faked. In a more public scenario, there is sexual ego and the thrill of projecting a positive sexual image. Women display their bodies to gain approval and positive affirmation from others.
Women are naturally more co-operative than men since they depend on others for protection and support. So women find ways of pleasing men and accommodating their desires. Women enhance their femininity by emphasising their vulnerability whereas men enhance their masculinity by projecting an image of dependability.
Kinsey found that only some women (36-44%) orgasm sometimes (70-77%) with a partner. More women openly admitted that they never orgasm with a partner. Overall masturbation alone was much the most reliable source of female orgasms.
Few women today admit to orgasm difficulties. Faking is easy when femaleorgasm is defined implicitly rather than in terms of specific psychological and physical stimuli.
Women explain their arousal during sex in terms of a relationship even though men's experience of orgasm has little to do with relationships.Women who masturbate also orgasm independently of a relationship because they use erotic fantasies for arousal.
Imagine a man who is blindfolded and who thinks that he is being stimulated by his ideal lover. Regardless of who stimulates him in reality he is still likely to orgasm.
In other words, as long as a person is MENTALLY aroused enough for orgasm, the physical component is simply that: PHYSICAL. So it is illogical when women claim to be aroused enough to orgasm with a partner yet they cannot masturbate to orgasm.
Masturbation is the primary sexual response. It is through masturbation that a person learns how, with sufficient mental arousal, they can stimulate themselves to orgasm.
Anyone who knows how to masturbate to orgasm is definitely motivated to do so.If women were as highly sexed as men no one would ever ask about female orgasm.
By Jane Thomas founder of